Top 9 Tips on What to do Before and on a First Date – The Do’s & Don’ts

Going on the first date is both exciting and nerve wrecking. You want to look cute but not like you’re trying too hard. You’re wondering if he’s going to be attracted to you and if he’ll call afterward. Could he be the one?

In today’s post, I’ll be covering some of the most popular concerns most of us have before and on a first date. I’ve based all of this advice on feedback from my male coworkers, male friends, and my own experiences to make it as applicable as possible. I hope that the advice in today’s post will help ease some of your first date nerves and get you date ready.

What to do on a first date

Top 9 Tips on What to do before and on a First Date – The Do’s & Don’ts

1. Talk on the phone before your date

Break the ice and get a feel for the guy before going on a date with him. Sometimes just doing this gives your intuition the opportunity to kick in to let you know if you actually want to follow through with going on the date. Talking on the phone won’t tell you everything but it’ll give you an idea of what to expect and maybe even help you see red flags or feel some chemistry right off the back.

2. Decline the Netflix and chill invite

If you get a random text the day after you’ve met a guy asking you to come over for an episode of House of Cards you should politely decline by letting him know you’d really like to get to know him in a public setting.

If you’re looking for a relationship you definitely don’t want to set yourself up for failure by accepting a private first date. In order to establish the respect, you need to show your standards early on.

3. Get yourself in the mood before your date

Try to avoid getting off work, rushing home to get ready, then rushing to your date. Give yourself at least an hour to unwind. I suggest turning on something funny or listening to some music to change your mood and energy.

On a date, you want to be in a positive state of mind and ready to laugh and have fun.

4. What have you been into lately? Have an idea of what you would want to talk about

What books, movies, or new concepts have you been into? Try to have at least one interesting topic to talk about. Ideally, you want the conversation to flow naturally but if it’s not it’s good to have something in your back pocket.

Don’t be the girl who just goes with the flow and says, “I’m not really into anything right now,” or “it’s whatever I’ll pretty much watch any movie.” Have something you’re excited about or at least interested in to talk about on your date. Remember it’s not just about your looks.

5. Don’t take it so seriously. Have fun and use your sense of humor to your advantage

Being fun is one of the most attractive qualities in a woman to men. So when you’re on your date try to relax and be playful. Sometimes we try to rush the process of getting to know someone and it ends up feeling more like an interview than a date. Slow down, enjoy being in the moment, and share a laugh or two with him.

6. Go with a natural makeup look and don’t overdress

You want to look cute but don’t overdo it. I’d say put most of your energy into making your hair look good. Aside from that just wear something flattering, carefree and cute but not over the top.

For makeup try to wear just enough to cover your blemishes, mascara, and a nude lipstick. You don’t have to do this but a natural makeup look is a lot more attractive to men than a bold smokey eye look.

7. Be yourself – If you’re an introvert be one and if you’re an extrovert be that. Never pretend.

When you’re on a first date with someone you’re really attracted to it’s easy to start trying to overcompensate to try to get the guy to like you more. Sometimes it might just be the nerves talking. Either way, try to stay grounded in who you really are. Even if it seems like he’s not reacting to you the way you’d like. I say that because you don’t want someone to fall for a lie.

8. Don’t put out on the first date

If you’re looking for a serious relationship it’s important to have high standards around sex. When you have sex early on it changes the dynamic of the relationship too soon and stops the guy’s pursuit of you prematurely.

Having sex too early also sets a poor foundation to build a relationship on. Instead, try to focus on the connection and friendship before engaging in sex.

9. Be opinionated

Share your perspective on topics that come up even if it goes against his opinion. You don’t want to be mean or aggressive but be honest. Your opinions should be based on your beliefs and values, so if you bump heads too much that’s an easy way to see that he isn’t the right guy for you.

At the same time being opinionated is really attractive because it shows that you have confidence and you know who you are.

Bonus Tips

  • Don’t give the guy your address. Meet him somewhere instead.
  • Google him. I know this isn’t the most romantic thing to do but the truth is you have to protect yourself because not all people are good. According to the USA today you can Google someone with their name in quotation marks and the city they live in where you’ll find a good about of general information on them. I would also check the sex offender registry.
  • Tell a friend where you’re going and who you’re going with. You could also ask them to call you at a certain time to check on you (this is especially applicable if you met online).

Be sure to get my free guide by submitting your name and email into the form below for a detailed guide on how to be irresistible to men. Thanks for reading!


Alexandria Toledo

Founder, Alex In The Sun

Other articles you might like:

Four Powerful Things That Will Make Him Choose You Over Her

How to Find Mr. Right – Why You Keep Attracting The Wrong Men

Qualities of a High-value Woman – Be The Woman He Craves

How to Get a boyfriend – Qualities Men Look For Before They Commit

How to be Magnetic & Make Him Chase You


What to do on the first date

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